I can’t want to fix something without believing, at some level, that it’s broken. And, unfortunately, I associate the state of being broken with being wrong.
My tendency to want to fix things isn’t too bad if it comes to a broken bookshelf, or some such thing, but it becomes an issue when it’s a situation or a person. Because I see that this tendency to want to fix something sets off a domino line of assumptions in my mind. If they have a problem they need help. If they need help they are helpless. If they are helpless they need me. If I am needed I am valuable.
In addition to me wanting to prove my worth, I also realize that my wanting to jump in and fix things, though seemingly helpful, is actually more about my being uncomfortable with things not being right, proper, fixed.
The idea just occurred to me, however, that something could be broken and be okay. Someone could have a “bad habit” and be okay. A situation could be uncomfortable and still be okay. Someone could have a problem and be okay. Someone could be making a mistake and be okay.
Being okay, being well, does not equal a complete lack of problems, challenges, mistakes, or issues.
I do think it’s perfectly natural to want to improve things or resolve challenging situations, but not for the sake of getting rid of something wrong or broken. Solving a problem, resolving an issue, is like answering a question. It is part of our expansion. And if I look at problems I encounter in my life in the “opportunity fox expansion” way as opposed to the “I must fix/destroy what is broken” way, it will serve me, and those around me, much better.